This is of no fault of our Mexican hosts (either hosts on the Journey nor the hosts of different site visits). But what I think I was frustrated by was that we actually probably could have had the opportunity to dye wool at Vida Nueva if we had wanted and maybe participated in other “hands-on” activities. . . but I don’t think we were clear in our requests. AND I think it’s a pretty unusual request in
I would find myself getting really anxious about the fact that we were spending so much time talking all of the time. However, I did notice that people were still asking questions during these sometimes long conversations and so there was still some interest. I also noticed, however, that not everyone was on the same wavelength in terms of their interest levels.
As we were planning the journey Sergio often reminded us of the Ivan Illich article and the fact that we can really be of no truly useful “help” to the people we visited on the journey (in terms of actually, physically doing something). BUUUT, I think that having the experience of just doing something together (whether it makes a difference in the end or not) is a different way of connecting and learning. It helps me to be doing something while I’m talking – I just don’t get so bored. When we create something together, we break down some of the power differentials and barriers between us. I really think it’s useful.
So, maybe this observation about the way that Mexicans love to interact and to learn through verbal communication is presumptuous or wrong. I am trying to be much more aware of my assumptions and fostering true, compassionate intercultural communication. However, I also feel like there is a stereotype about white, U.S. Americans, especially women – that we do not have the capacity, interest or endurance to do physical work. I guess I am thinking specifically about or day at CASITA – where I loved the upcycling workshop but I wondered what happened to the opportunities to work on the bici-machinas and the building of the new composting toilet system. I don’t know if this was just bad timing, people not being confident that we could be of any use or completely coincidental. Anyway, one of my few regrets in the design of the Journey was not getting clearer with our hosts about our interests in doing physical work. I would have loved more physical opportunities! Sometimes I felt like all we did was eat, sleep, drink and talk. This made my goal of being in my body pretty tricky.
My experience with the limpia at the women’s weaving cooperative was pretty intense. I had absolutely no idea what to expect at all. I also didn’t know whether or not it was going to happen and I knew that the women at Vida Nueva had said they would do it, but not as part of the itinerary of our visit. At first they said that it wasn’t going to be possible because of the sick woman who they were caring for. Then when we were looking at the looms, Sergio asked if I still wanted it.
I think I would’ve liked to have explained to everyone what was going on . . . but at that point people were in the middle of something else and I was just really feeling like I did need the cleansing. I needed to lighten up, to let go of some stuff I was holding onto. First, I sat down in a chair next to the kitchen table. The healer went to the garden and picked bunches of fresh herbs and spices – rosemary and I think what might have been oregano. Maria helped to translate that I should sit still and focus my energy in my head somewhere. When she first started rubbing me with the spices and the alcohol, the fumes were very intense. Very painful and stinging sensations filled my eyes. Then things became easier after a while. I felt a little uncomfortable because I think it might have been easier if I had been wearing fewer clothes. I had rosemary and other spices rubbed all over me – back, chest, arms and legs. It was amazingly refreshing by the end. The healer pushed on some places in my upper back and shoulders that were really sore. She knew where those spaces were and my body fell into hers when she pressed.
The exercise with the egg at the end was the most amazing to me though. She rubbed an uncooked egg all over my body and chanted a little and then broke the egg into a glass of water. Each egg apparently breaks differently depending on the person. In my case, the yolk sort of floated in the middle of the water. The white part – which became opaque in the water formed a kind of cap over the top of the yolk and all around it – like a wavy ring around a planet. She told me through Maria that physically I was healthy and well but I was protecting myself emotionally. Somewhere deep inside I was feeling very sad. I needed to open this place inside me up and release the fears and other negative emotions that were there. She told me that perhaps there was someone in my life who could help me at this time to heal emotionally.
I was amazed by how accurate the reading of the egg in the limpia was – it seemed right on and even the way that the egg looked in the water seemed to represent how I was feeling at the time. It was also wonderful to walk away feeling so calm and clear and grounded. I did feel tired and a little woozy later on in the afternoon, but it made me clearer about how I needed to be on the journey. It was also wonderful to find pieces of rosemary and oregano and other mysterious spices in my bra and down my shirt when I got ready for bed that night.
I just have to write one more thing here as well . . . I have just returned to the States and the three hours that I’ve been here have made me realize how much I really do not want to live here right now. I just spent a few hours in the
